Monday, April 13, 2009

MS?! Sure hope not.

I was just watching House tonight, and someone said that Scandinavians are more likely to get MS, well that would include my whole family, frak! Ok, so I went and looked it up on Wikipedia, and read the list of symptoms, and such. Apparently I have nearly every symptom on the list, and have for many years. For instance, extreme random pain for no apparent reason, like I'm just sitting in a chair watching House, and suddenly my right pinky finger's top joint flares up in horrible pain, that takes my breath away. Then, a few minutes later, it's gone, and I'm fine. Parts of my face start twitching and won't stop, like my right eye, it's been twitching practically non stop for over a year now. Oh yes, there is that horrible migraine that lasted a whole month, non stop, after a head injury, which kept me from getting any sleep at all. I mean I'd nod off for a minute, and wake up again, no actual sleep. Which drove me nuts, till a neurologist at the hospital finally gave me really expensive meds that let me get the sleep I needed, and made the pain go away. I was in heaven! By expensive meds I mean pills that cost $90 per pill, and they came in a pack of like 20. I have had balance problems for several years too. And sometimes my speech gets slured, no idea why, it just gets real hard to form the words properly, which only started happening maybe 10 years ago. Oh yes, random muscle contractions all over my body, not just the twitching in my face, like my right eye that won't stop bothering me.

Some people have told me I'm a hypochondriac, well, I'm not. I have never lied about any of my symptoms, aches, pains, and such. Just a few weeks ago I suddenly fell backwards into my chest of drawers, no reason, I was just walking into my room, and suddenly it was like the floor moved out from under me, which it didn't of course. What happened is I utterly lost my balance for no apparent reason.

I have asthma, so I know my immune system is over reacting to things, so why wouldn't it start screwing with other things in my body? Why would it be so very impossible for it to attack my nervous system? I think this could be symptoms of MS, but I don't know for sure. When I'm typing on the computer, and one of my hands suddenly starts shaking uncontrollably, or when I'm sleeping and one of my arms starts flapping around waking me up, it's irritating. But it's not scary, or horribly painful. It's not like it keeps me from working or having fun. It's just annoying. But what if it might become something really bad? Meh, whatever.

I just hope I don't go blind some day, that would totally suck for me, since nearly everything I love involves SEEING, like blogging, reading sci-fi, watching Doctor Who. I just can't appreciate all that stuff if I can't see it. Maybe I could if I was born blind, and just learned how to use other senses and stuff. But I wasn't. It would be a big loss for me.

And I've had constipation and diahrea issues my whole life, which means nothing really, unless it's caused by MS, then it means something. So I'm irregular, so what, I can take fiber or something and I'm fine. Right? Man, being human is just plain nasty. Yuck. Who in their right mind would choose to be a human. We are way more disgusting than, like, trees. I want to be a tree. Big and tall, swaying in the breeze, soaking up sun, yah!

I doubt I have MS, but if I do, it's not bothering me a whole lot, yet. Naw, I worry a lot more about my bad knees and back, those hurt a lot, and don't seem to get better with time at all.

I need to lose this excess energy storage and build up my motion motivators. That means getting rid of fat and making more muscle. :) Hey, at least I know I've got issues, awareness is the first step to solving them.

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